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  1. #1
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    Loneliness is the biggest killer...

    Dropping the guard here...I work as a webcam girl, so all outward appearences show I'm a happy extrovert having a great time...don't get me wrong, I love what I do and it takes care of some of the built up sexual frustration of being a single woman... but how marvellous would it be to have someone here to share the giggles, craziness and downright absurdity of my profession But even better, would be sharing space, time and nothingness with a smiling face. Waking in the morning and taking turns at eggs and bacon, choosing the next documentary to watch and watching the grass grow from the living room window and mowing it together. The internet helps take the edge of those longings, but oh....anyone else feeling it?
    I was spared the rod and it made me wild...

  2. #2
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    I was married for almost 20 years and unfortunately, felt alone and isolated much of that time despite sharing a home and children. When we separated, I began to be brave and have filled my life with wonderful people, some of whom I met here. I hope things get a bit brighter for you.
    To thine own self be true

  3. #3
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    Thank you Tinkerbella,
    Yes i have spent most of my adult life alone despite bringing up 4 children, and the biggest loneliness was when in a relationship with the wrong person! I am grateful to not be in that situation...but how good must it feel to be with the right company...I am envious of the few that feel that...
    I was spared the rod and it made me wild...

  4. #4
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    I moved away from London and left my friends behind. I feel isolated where I live now. The internet does help sometimes. But sometimes it emphasises your loneliness.
    The Pen is mightier than the Sword.

    Unless of course your opponent actually has a Sword!

  5. #5
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    See? I told you you'd settle in.
    Fighting World Naughtiness one bum at a time.

  6. #6
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    I suppose I've become a bit of a 'puter hermit' too, but it has been a great help in meeting people in r/l so don't knock it. I've never been one for the pub scene or any of those other contrived venues where people tentatively feel each other out, metaphorically speaking. The internet allows us to zoom right in on others of the persuasion without too much reliance on nuance or shilly-shallying. Problems can arise over politics and attitudes towards issues of the day, but I've learned to mostly avoid those. We meet for some bare bottom fun, maybe once, maybe more, just depends. Sometimes firmer friendships are established once we dip our toes further into the water. Certainly nothing but frustration is gained from just a one-to-one relationship with a screen and a black box. Gotta make it work for you.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Afro_deeziak View Post
    Dropping the guard here...I work as a webcam girl, so all outward appearences show I'm a happy extrovert having a great time...don't get me wrong, I love what I do and it takes care of some of the built up sexual frustration of being a single woman... but how marvellous would it be to have someone here to share the giggles, craziness and downright absurdity of my profession But even better, would be sharing space, time and nothingness with a smiling face. Waking in the morning and taking turns at eggs and bacon, choosing the next documentary to watch and watching the grass grow from the living room window and mowing it together. The internet helps take the edge of those longings, but oh....anyone else feeling it?
    The hardest thing is to find someone special to share a life with....not just someone.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Miss Kay View Post
    The hardest thing is to find someone special to share a life with....not just someone.
    Ah yes...that's the problem(or the safeguarding, depends how you look at it)...it can't be someone as we were inclined to settle for in younger years...it has to be THE ONE!! I am impatient, never thought it would take this long, being 50...but I hear of stories with happy endings which began in far greater years than my own...and I smile...
    I was spared the rod and it made me wild...

  9. #9
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    Afro_deeziak said:
    I work as a webcam girl
    That's gone over my head! I ask a question as I don’t know the answer!. What is 'a webcam girl' and why does it suggest you're a happy extrovert having a great time?

    My home was empty all last week. I spent it alone and spoke to no one. It was wonderful. I cooked and eat when I wanted and didn't have to cope with the demands and needs of others. My closest friends died some time ago and my other friend married a horror so I stopped going to the pub. My children are away from home for various reason and their mother was visiting them. To some extent I resented her return as it means extra cooking! Strangely enough I'm most likely to feel lonely when their mother is home. Essentially, our only shared interest is football, but other than that we have very little in common. We read different books and newspapers, use different media or entertainment and watch different TV programmes. An indication of our lack of shared interests is that she thinks spanking is akin to paedophilia. I don’t dislike her. There’s no conflict or hostility between us. Fundamentally, it’s easier to stay than to go. (This should be read as being about self pity. It’s not. I’m not unhappy but I know if I met someone who liked spanking ….)

    hear of stories with happy endings which began in far greater years than my own


    My 60 odd years old friend got married last year. She's a horror. Jealous when he says hello to another woman. Flounces off. He always runs after her not realizing that he's rewarding her poor behaviour by focusing all his attention on her.

  10. #10
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    Afro_deeziak said:
    I work as a webcam girl
    That's gone over my head! I ask a question as I don’t know the answer!. What is 'a webcam girl' and why does it suggest you're a happy extrovert having a great time?

    My home was empty all last week. I spent it alone and spoke to no one. It was wonderful. I cooked and eat when I wanted and didn't have to cope with the demands and needs of others. My closest friends died some time ago and my other friend married a horror so I stopped going to the pub. My children are away from home for various reason and their mother was visiting them. To some extent I resented her return as it means extra cooking! Strangely enough I'm most likely to feel lonely when their mother is home. Essentially, our only shared interest is football, but other than that we have very little in common. We read different books and newspapers, use different media or entertainment and watch different TV programmes. An indication of our lack of shared interests is that she thinks spanking is akin to paedophilia. I don’t dislike her. There’s no conflict or hostility between us. Fundamentally, it’s easier to stay than to go. (This should be read as being about self pity. It’s not. I’m not unhappy but I know if I met someone who liked spanking …. It'd be like being in heaven to go to bed with a strapped bottom!)

    hear of stories with happy endings which began in far greater years than my own


    My 60 odd years old friend got married last year. But, it's not a happy ending. She's a horror. Jealous when he says hello to another woman. She flounces off. He always runs after her not realizing that he's rewarding her poor behaviour by focusing all his attention on her.
    Last edited by mortinuk; 22-05-2017 at 12:24.

  11. #11
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    Hello Sweetie. Thank you to you and Miss Kay for your thoughts on this. I get the drift entirely.

    I wish you both have great success. I have over time had some but not with the lifelong partner type thing that my parents were like. I am not sure that you ever find someone like that now and that is probably due more to life being as it is now rather than anything else.

    Lots of people seem to meet serious partners through spanking. My own personal experience of it over the last few years is that yes you can meet someone through a spanking site and meet them and then go out with them but in the end you have no other connection beyond spanking so it doesn't work. I wonder whether it's best to find someone who appears vanilla and exactly fits then being brave enough to say it to them. I know though how hard that can be. But if you have that thing then perhaps they will go with it and learn.

    I agree though being a perv adds that extra level of difficulty to the question of finding a partner. I get chatted to by ladies round town when they tell me all about their dog and ask whether I might be going my to the concert and drinks on Friday when I am standing there wearing a thong under my trousers with my bottom covered in cane stripes. I look like a vicar on the outside.




    Quote Originally Posted by Afro_deeziak View Post
    Ah yes...that's the problem(or the safeguarding, depends how you look at it)...it can't be someone as we were inclined to settle for in younger years...it has to be THE ONE!! I am impatient, never thought it would take this long, being 50...but I hear of stories with happy endings which began in far greater years than my own...and I smile...

  12. #12
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    Being resolutely single (impossible to live with, and all that....) friends are important to me. I'm blessed in having around 20 lasting and close friends. Most are guys from different circles dating from uni days and are still happily married. What is curious, casting my mind back, is that at least half of these met their other halves in the workplace. Only one to my knowledge met his wife through an introduction agency (Dinner Dates I recall). Obviously these hook-ups were largely pre-internet, with its much wider opportunities, but it shows how important work was - not really surprising, as you got to know people pretty well, warts and all, before venturing to the asking-out stage. Clearly the workplace dating agency would be harder if you're into kink, given the potential fallout if it goes titsup. Many of the young people I know now work in the gig-economy (into which I would include the OP of this thread). I expect it's harder for them to form deep friendships that might lead somewhere further - but against that I imagine their connection pool is wider than in the traditional workplace, if not as deep. Swings and roundabouts really.

    Just to add to this catalogue, the brother of a very good friend who I meet most weeks announced last October he's marrying a girl from work - she's his first girlfriend, aged 35 against his 59, a former 'carpet-muncher', but really keen to have children. His sister's a bit anti, but my friend thinks it'll work. And in a sports club I'm in, we've all raised an eyebrow this spring to the getting together of a girl in her mid-20s with a bloke in his early 60's. But they seem genuinely happy. It's good to see such diversity of relationships!

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by RonM View Post
    I've never been one for the pub scene or any of those other contrived venues where people tentatively feel each other out, metaphorically speaking.
    Yes, there's a lot to be said for a more hands-on approach, literally speaking.

    Nobody loves a smartarse

  14. #14
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    Yes I met my first long term partner at work. That was in the 80s when if you weren't bonking at least one person else in the office it was raised as a problem at your annual appraisal.

    If not you werent fully committed to the firm's culture.


    One temp told me the firm was known in the sisterhood of temp secretaries as

    Dowe Screwthem and How.

    Shame she dumped me in the end.



    QUOTE=OneMoreForLuck;1233957]Being resolutely single (impossible to live with, and all that....) friends are important to me. I'm blessed in having around 20 lasting and close friends. Most are guys from different circles dating from uni days and are still happily married. What is curious, casting my mind back, is that at least half of these met their other halves in the workplace. Only one to my knowledge met his wife through an introduction agency (Dinner Dates I recall). Obviously these hook-ups were largely pre-internet, with its much wider opportunities, but it shows how important work was - not really surprising, as you got to know people pretty well, warts and all, before venturing to the asking-out stage. Clearly the workplace dating agency would be harder if you're into kink, given the potential fallout if it goes titsup. Many of the young people I know now work in the gig-economy (into which I would include the OP of this thread). I expect it's harder for them to form deep friendships that might lead somewhere further - but against that I imagine their connection pool is wider than in the traditional workplace, if not as deep. Swings and roundabouts really.

    Just to add to this catalogue, the brother of a very good friend who I meet most weeks announced last October he's marrying a girl from work - she's his first girlfriend, aged 35 against his 59, a former 'carpet-muncher', but really keen to have children. His sister's a bit anti, but my friend thinks it'll work. And in a sports club I'm in, we've all raised an eyebrow this spring to the getting together of a girl in her mid-20s with a bloke in his early 60's. But they seem genuinely happy. It's good to see such diversity of relationships![/QUOTE]
    Last edited by Burgundy; 23-05-2017 at 12:39.

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Burgundy View Post
    I agree though being a perv adds that extra level of difficulty to the question of finding a partner. I get chatted to by ladies round town when they tell me all about their dog and ask whether I might be going my to the concert and drinks on Friday when I am standing there wearing a thong under my trousers with my bottom covered in cane stripes. I look like a vicar on the outside.
    Haha I love this Burgundy, made me laugh out loud (which is therapy in itself). I have started getting to know some of you on here through messaging and that's really helping. At least I now have some interaction. I guess the answer is to step out of my comfort zone. I have never ever posted on a forum before, so it's a step...a small one...but a step
    I was spared the rod and it made me wild...

  16. #16
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    Well, Burgundy, that reminds me of somewhere I once worked and where the night watchman interrupted a couple 'at it' in the ladies'. (Quite what the night watchman was doing in the ladies' is an entirely separate issue.) Curiously this story, which assumed urban myth status in later years, did the lady's career and reputation no harm at all - she went on to become a very big hitter.

    Those were the days when such antics were normal. Nowadays, smart phones would mean an audio clip of the encounter would have twittered round the globe before they finished their respective breakfasts........

    Quote Originally Posted by Burgundy View Post
    Yes I met my first long term partner at work. That was in the 80s when if you weren't bonking at least one person else in the office it was raised as a problem at your annual appraisal.

    If not you werent fully committed to the firm's culture.


    One temp told me the firm was known in the sisterhood of temp secretaries as

    Dowe Screwthem and How.

    Shame she dumped me in the end.



    QUOTE=OneMoreForLuck;1233957]Being resolutely single (impossible to live with, and all that....) friends are important to me. I'm blessed in having around 20 lasting and close friends. Most are guys from different circles dating from uni days and are still happily married. What is curious, casting my mind back, is that at least half of these met their other halves in the workplace. Only one to my knowledge met his wife through an introduction agency (Dinner Dates I recall). Obviously these hook-ups were largely pre-internet, with its much wider opportunities, but it shows how important work was - not really surprising, as you got to know people pretty well, warts and all, before venturing to the asking-out stage. Clearly the workplace dating agency would be harder if you're into kink, given the potential fallout if it goes titsup. Many of the young people I know now work in the gig-economy (into which I would include the OP of this thread). I expect it's harder for them to form deep friendships that might lead somewhere further - but against that I imagine their connection pool is wider than in the traditional workplace, if not as deep. Swings and roundabouts really.

    Just to add to this catalogue, the brother of a very good friend who I meet most weeks announced last October he's marrying a girl from work - she's his first girlfriend, aged 35 against his 59, a former 'carpet-muncher', but really keen to have children. His sister's a bit anti, but my friend thinks it'll work. And in a sports club I'm in, we've all raised an eyebrow this spring to the getting together of a girl in her mid-20s with a bloke in his early 60's. But they seem genuinely happy. It's good to see such diversity of relationships!
    [/QUOTE]

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by OneMoreForLuck View Post
    Well, Burgundy, that reminds me of somewhere I once worked and where the night watchman interrupted a couple 'at it' in the ladies'. (Quite what the night watchman was doing in the ladies' is an entirely separate issue.)
    He was watching. Obviously - that's one of the main things in a watchman's job description!

    Nobody loves a smartarse

  18. #18
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    I remember a party where one of the senior married partners went into the ladies with two ladies and came out wearing one of their dresses. A couple who were genuinely dating got pissed and went and shagged upstairs and were caught by such a watchman. He got told he had no future with the firm. Worked out well for him given his current role.

    QUOTE=smartarse;1234014]He was watching. Obviously - that's one of the main things in a watchman's job description![/QUOTE]

  19. #19
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    Thank you. Put your best foot forward.

    QUOTE=Afro_deeziak;1233988]Haha I love this Burgundy, made me laugh out loud (which is therapy in itself). I have started getting to know some of you on here through messaging and that's really helping. At least I now have some interaction. I guess the answer is to step out of my comfort zone. I have never ever posted on a forum before, so it's a step...a small one...but a step [/QUOTE]

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